A Life Worth Living
by Cloud-Mercury07
Summary: A Reborn/Lambo fic. Lambo is finding it hard to cope with the fact he was too coward to tell Reborn what he really felt. Now that its all too late, what can Lambo do to put things right?
1. Chapter 1

"So go on and shoot me, stupid cow." Reborn had mocked, perched on the edge of a coffee table in a hotel room.

Lambo cocked the gun, not moving it away from its pointing between the Mafioso's eyes. He knew he couldn't go through with it. Not now, after all these months of confusion and anger and raging… hormones. Reborn tilted his hat down over his eyes casually.

"If that was all, I'll be going."

Lambo sighed deeply and shut one eye again in his usual manner. Nodding curtly, Reborn lifted himself from his slouched position and walked out the door. Just walking. Alive and well. Lambo's mission had failed. 'Damn it!!! Why can't I kill him? Why can't I just kill him and let it be done with--?"

---------------------

Lambo pressed his forehead against the cruelly cold glass, breathing mist circles onto the car window. He didn't smile at the memory of letting Reborn live.

He would have done, had someone else not made the decision he could not.

The Vongola 10th twisted round in his seat, clamping a heavy but friendly hand on the Thunder guardian's shoulder.

"Lambo, are you okay?"

His eyes were cold, no warmth ran through them anymore. The Thunder guardian spoke not a word, shaking his head in disbelief. He managed only to lightly clear his throat and accidentally choked up a little.

"You don't have to see the body, if you don't want to…"

"No, no, I want to see him… one last time."

Tsuna nodded solemnly before returning to glaring out the opposite window at the falling rain. Lambo pressed a hand against the glass, his fingertips tracing the raindrops that looked so much like the tears he did not wish to release.

'Gotta…stay…calm.'

The Vongola car pulled up outside the hospital and Tsuna, Gokudera and Lambo each got out of the car and opened up black umbrellas to protect them from the rain.

Striding towards the front doors, they saw a doctor wearing a long white lab coat and clutching his stethoscope. The man seemed nervous, sweat beading along his brow.

"Vongola 10th and trusted guardians?" he asked when they had reached him.

"Yes," Tsuna said

"Welcome back, I received word that you wished to see the body again."

"Yes," Tsuna repeated, but glanced warily at Lambo's expression; which was surprisingly passive.

"Then please, follow me."

The four men walked through corridors and passageways deep into the hospital. They heard screaming babies, beeping monitors, laughter, crying, despair, hope.

"As I have previously stated upon your last visit, Mr. Vongola, everyone here did everything that they could, especially Dr. Shamal, who was particularly persistent. He worked on the hitman long after we had given up a-"

"Shut up! You're depressing the 10th even more, teme!" Tsuna seemed to agree, but Lambo did not miss Gokudera's anxious glance in _his_ direction.

All too soon, the three of them were brought to a halt outside a heavily guarded room.

"Dino?" Tsuna asked a blonde guard standing closest to the door.

"Ah, little bro." Dino replied, looking up from under his hat. His words were friendly, but his face stony.

"We'll talk later, Dino. Right now…" he gesticulated towards Lambo.

"Of course."

As Dino swept a card through the entrance access barrier, all eyes seemed to be on Lambo. It was the kind of attention he'd always craved as a child, but now he had it for all the wrong reasons.

'_For being in love with a dead man, who never knew…' _

They stepped into the room, which was empty save for a long grey table in the middle, covered with a satin white cloth and a beautiful red rose placed on top. It wasn't hard to tell that it was Reborn's body under that cloth, but still Lambo denied the inevitable.

'He can't be dead, he's Reborn. Reborn never dies, he's the cockroach…' Many attempts at Reborn's life flashed before Lambo's eyes. A handful of them were his own, but all of those had failed and several were from a long, long time ago.

Snapping back to reality, he watched Gokudera walk around to pick up the rose from it's place on the cloth and felt Tsuna's hand lightly resting once more upon his shoulder.

"Lambo, you don't have to do this…"

"Yes I do. I want to see him."

He gently removed Tsuna's hand from its resting place and stepped towards the table so that his face was hovering directly over where Reborn's face would soon appear. Gokudera looked to Tsuna for guidance, who shut his eyes and signalled a countdown from three. On one, Gokudera tugged back the cloth to reveal Reborn's still body.

Lambo said nothing. Both of his eyes were open for the first time in forever, he wanted to take it all in and be able to cherish the image of Reborn's face in his mind for the rest of eternity. As soon as the cover was pulled back, it felt to Lambo as though he and Reborn were the only ones in the room. He forgot all other presences and let everything he wanted to say free.

"Reborn, you look like you're sleeping. Come on stupid Reborn, wake up and annoy me. Say it was all a joke. Hit me, like you always used to."

Tsuna shuffled uncomfortably, edging towards Lambo in order to be a support. The Thunder guardian grappled at Reborn's lapels. He was still dressed in his same suave hitman suit.

"You were supposed to be unbeatable! Why were you so famous if all you could do is die?" Lambo spat angrily, clutching on to the cotton fabric.

He was marginally aware of Gokudera yelling something like "let _go_, stupid cow" but it didn't deter him.

"I'd give anything. Anything you needed, I'd do it, just so I could tell you. I love you Reborn! I f****** love you! Where are you when I need you!?"

Lambo gave up and slumped against the dead man's chest.

"Gotta… stay… calm…" he whispered into the suit, while his tears fell softly, absorbing into the shirt.

He'd already decided that he wouldn't let go, and when closing time came, Tsuna had to deal with a very stubborn cow.

Up until now, Lambo had remained crying upon Reborn's corpse. Gokudera and Tsuna had gotten chairs brought in and had sat in the corner of the room, observing quietly.

Gokudera had had to return home to take care of an important business phone call from Italy. Now Tsuna was left alone, forcefully and physically moving Lambo away from Reborn.

"Come on, Lambo, we have to let him go…"

"No! I'm not leaving him!"

"I know it's difficult, but…"

Lambo stopped, his stomach lurching. The death of Reborn seemed to have finally hit him.

"I'm going to be sick." Lambo claimed, stumbling to place his hand against one of the walls for support.

Tsuna was wise enough to stay away.

Suddenly, a thick burst of purple smoke erupted and a baby-like whine emerged from it.

"Child Lambo!" Tsuna exclaimed, shocked at the sudden use of the 10 year bazooka after an absence of its use for over 3 years. He smiled at the small innocent child who wriggled in his arms, yelling something about "bogies" and "octopus balls".

"You're **8 years old**, Lambo!" Tsuna scolded, not surprised in the least at the fact that Lambo was still acting as though he were 5.


	2. Chapter 2

The weeping Lambo spluttered as the purple smoke cleared. His eyes widened as he realised what had happened.

"The 10 year bazooka?" he asked aloud.

"Adult Lambo?" came the reply.

"Ah, young Vongola." Lambo tried to remain calm for the young Vongola's sake. He did not wish to upset the child at the terrible news from the future.

"Lambo, your eyes are all red…"

"Yare Yare. Oh, that. That's nothing."

"Ciaossu." Lambo's eyes widened again as he swivelled on his heels to face…

"**REBORN!**"

"This is surprising, Lambo hasn't used the 10-year bazooka in a while."

"The stupid cow must have lost it." Gokudera said from his chair.

… "Uhh, adult Lambo, why are you hugging Reborn?" Tsuna asked anxiously.

Before Lambo had a chance to even begin explaining as to why he had so intimately wrapped his arms around the child Reborn, Reborn had spoken.

"I will sort the stupid cow out."

Lambo felt pain like never before erupt in his forehead. He opened his mouth to scream, but he had already hit the ground. He could faintly hear yelling.

'Yare, yare, what a shame,' Lambo thought 'If I wasn't going to die, I could have stopped Reborn's death in the future.'

With that singular thought, a bright green flame began to burn through his hair. He involuntarily leapt forth, his clothes ripping away from his body, leaving him standing in some rather flattering cow-print boxer shorts.

"REBORN!" he yelled.

"Reborn, what if he didn't have any regrets, you could have _killed_ Lambo!" Tsuna scorned.

"No-good-Tsuna, you already noticed that Lambo's eyes were red."

Lambo sprang forwards, explaining his situation at 100 miles per hour. He raced through how Reborn's death had come about and what he thought they should do about it. Finally, he got onto how much Reborn's death had affected everyone, especially him. During his explanation, Reborn's expression did not change, but his hat sunk lower and lower over his eyes.

Eventually, the green flame burnt out, just in time for Lambo to finish: "I love you, Reborn."

Gokudera squirmed in his seat, whereas Tsuna yelled: "You mean in the future, you two are… you two are?"

"Young Vongola, did I ever say that Reborn loved me also?"

"You didn't tell me, stupid cow?" Reborn spoke up, his face expressionless.

"No… I couldn't, you died before I got the chance."

"Ah."

"How did you know I--?"

"I would have told you the same."

Lambo blinked in a shocked fashion. Gokudera rolled his eyes and Tsuna merely frowned, just as Lambo voiced what they were all thinking: "Che, you're lying Reborn."

"I don't lie."

Everyone in the rooms eyes widened.

Gokudera coughed stupendously loudly, making them all jump.

"Now before you make the 10th vomit, tell us again how Reborn comes to die, stupid cow."

Lambo chuckled lightly as he remembered a few words he had spoken as a child in Inoue's house: "I'm gonna boom Reborn and beat him!"

"To none of our surprise, it was not I who finally ended Reborn's life. Therefore, as you may have gathered, in the future, I do not achieve my goal of becoming the Bovino family's boss." Lambo explained, with an air of nostalgia.

"Cut the self pity crap!" Gokudera yelled, just before a soft toy came into contact with Lambo's face.


	3. Chapter 3

Lambo nursed his cheek where the teddy bear had hit. This had both earned a mocking: "You own stuffed bears, Tsuna?" from Reborn and a distraction from the matter at hand. Lambo did not mind at all, in fact, he felt extremely comfortable being here. He wished that it could be his universe, that his timeline could be this one, where he was still an unknowing child and Reborn had not yet died.

He swept his wavy hair from his eyes to realise that the three younger generation Vongola males were staring at him expectantly. Sighing, he opened his mouth to continue his explanation when he felt a sudden lurch in his abdomen, like he was going to be sick.

'No...' he thought, desperately. 'I can't go back... I haven't saved Reborn!'

His heart dropped as he watched Tsuna's bedroom dissolve in a swirl of purple smoke. Due to the shocking news from the future, they had all forgotten the five minute limitations of the 10-year-bazooka. He wondered if he would be able to return. He himself no longer owned the bazooka, as it had been seized and sought after during many of their battles. Some of the lower ranking Vongola had needlessly died for its preservation as a secret weapon when other mafia families had come in search of it. Therefore, it was Reborn that had decided to keep it locked away in the most secure place he knew- his own secret storage safe. Lambo had liked to think that Reborn had done so partly out of concern for his safety, because he had often still carried it around with him and so was vulnerable to attacks.

As Lambo was swept weightlessly through the purple tunnel void of the bazooka, he wondered if Reborn would have still made the same decision if he'd have known it could be the key to saving his own life. No. Reborn wasn't like that. He'd have made the same decision; because he valued the lives of others more than his own. To Lambo's constant stress and worry, Reborn had viewed his own life as dispensable, always believing in sacrifice for the greater good. However, sadly, his actual death had been pointless and a total waste. In fact, Vongola had suffered since due to everyone's depression. Little work had been done and everyone was expecting an attack.

"Lambo, do you need to be alone?" spoke a soft voice. It was the older Vongola 10th, who had watched the adult Lambo slump from the purple smoke and sit on the floor of the room where Reborn's body lay cold and motionless. Lambo had hardly realised his time travelling had ceased, he often let his thoughts run away with him.

"Ah! No... I think we need to call a meeting." Lambo advised.

------------------------------------------------------------------

As he glanced around the table, Lambo even managed to give a weak and nervous smile. Tsuna could really work miracles, sometimes. Each of the Vongola Guardians were seated there. They were uninformed and dishevelled, but they were there. Lambo stood at the head of the table, ready to address all of them. Despite his tendency through childhood to crave attention, he'd never had so many eyes trained on him. He swallowed hard and kept repeating the same thought in his mind.

'This will save Reborn...'

"As we all know, this month has not been easy. We've lost a ... well, we've lost Reborn." There didn't seem to be words enough to describe the hitman's importance or relation to each of them.

"Cut to the chase." Hibari ordered, narrowing his eyes. He did not have the patience to sit through an emotional ordeal like that of when Reborn had actually died. He understood the pain, but it was hard for he himself to remain as unemotional and unattached as he usually was when everyone else was acting the complete opposite. The man wished to avoid showing any weakness of that sort. Hibird ruffled its feathers on his shoulder.

Tsuna gave Lambo a reassuring nod and the Thunder Guardian continued.

"Well, as we also all know, Reborn hid the 10-year-bazooka away in an impossibly secure and secretive place. Luckily, my younger self has recently resumed using his. With the capability to time travel once more, I am certain that I could somehow put a stop to Reborn's death in this time era." Lambo motioned a hand towards Tsuna before resuming his topic of conversation. "We have called you all here because we are hoping to find the 10-year-bazooka hidden here so that we can perhaps all travel to the past and stop the Fuoco Organisation from ever assembling."

Yamamoto leaned back in his chair and scratched his head.

"So... why aren't we letting our younger selves carry out the job?" he asked

"Because the leader was conditioned to make such an organisation from a young age, teme. Didn't you ever read our informational files on him?" Gokudera fumed.

"Aha. Uh, no, I don't like reading, much." Yamamoto explained, with a totally innocent look on his face.

"Well, for this idiot and anyone else who neglected to become informed on such important matters: The leader of the Fuoco Organisation is about two years older than our Juudaime." He nodded in Tsuna's general direction. "We know his name is Kishin Masashi and have his whole background on file. Ten years ago, he only lived in the next town over from Namimori. We can't allow our younger selves to kill... and this much is necessary. Masashi has been demonic from a young age, driven by his power hungry father to become a killing machine. In the past, he has not yet murdered and therefore is still an innocent. However, we know that he will soon become savage and commit his first kill. Then, in the next five years will establish the Fuoco Organisation, who are hell-bent on destruction. Their only goal is to kill off the strongest of the strongest. That brings us to today, with the death of Reborn. It is possible that they may come after any one of us, next."

"And so we're going to go to the past and... innihilate Kishin while he is still innocent. If there were any other way, believe me, I would take it. Masashi is a psychopath... if we don't stop him before he has tasted his first blood, we will change nothing. I don't wish to put the burden of killing a current innocent on my younger selve's hands. I have a knowledge that it would change me in ways we dare not hope to wonder upon." Tsuna interrupted. "Now, here are my instructions. Reborn only ever informed me that his secret storage is in Japan. I want everyone to do their best to find and retrieve the 10-year-bazooka, so I have assigned tasks for each of you."

Lambo sat slowly back down in his chair at the head of the table. It was not his usual place, but this had originally been his meeting to hold. Now, as usual, all eyes were back on Tsuna. He felt a sense of relief. Somehow, everything seemed back to normal. It was just the good old Vongola Famiglia going off on another mission with all hands on deck. Only, someone was devestatingly absent.

"Hibari, I want you to stay here in Namimori. Ensure that you enquire of everyone here that Reborn has connections to as to where the storage may be. Search the local area- underground, public places, the works. It's likely Reborn had his secrets hidden right under our noses." He paused before turning to Gokudera. "Gokudera, please travel to Italy for a while. Contact everyone with links to Reborn and the Vongola 9th, anyone that may have an answer. Lambo is going to come with you in order to seek help from the Bovino family who constructed the bazooka. Bear in mind that he may be switched with child Lambo. Every time this occurs, I want a full report of any progression made in the past. Lambo, find out as much as you can about Masashi. Learn his daily routines, how we can corner him."

Lambo nodded curtly.

"Chrome and Ryohei, both of you go North and do the same as Hibari. Chrome, you check out the Eastern areas and Ryohei, the Western. Report back to each other if you find anything. Yamamoto and I will go South and do the same. Yamamoto will be covering the Eastern areas. You know how to contact me."

With that, everyone instantly stood as Tsuna left. Gokudera looked a little disheartened that the 10th would be travelling south with Yamamoto and not he, but he understood the importance of his task and had very little will to argue. Hibari, Chrome and Yamamoto had all followed Tsuna's leave. Lambo turned to follow suit, before Ryohei stood in his path.

"We'll save him." He said consollingly. "For your sake, I'll do my best to the EXTREME!"

The yelled word left Lambo reeling, but full of thankfulness. Ryohei may not have been particularly close to Reborn, but he did care about the family and the effects the hitman's death was having on each of them. Although Lambo was hit the hardest by the death, he was also the one that everyone was trying to heal. It had been long known by many of the guardians that Lambo was in love with Reborn, before he himself could even admit it to anyone.

Gokudera finished cursing at Ryohei's back as he left the room also. Now it was just he and Lambo, who was not willing to hang around.

"Come on, Stupid Cow. Let's go." They set off together.


	4. Chapter 4

In a matter of days, Lambo found himself kneeling in front of the Bovino family boss. It was the title he'd desired more than anything in the world for a very long time, and to achieve it, all he had to do was assasinate Reborn. That was his goal the last time that Lambo had seen him alive- when Reborn had perched himself on his hotel room coffee table. However, as it had turned out, Reborn meant more to Lambo than the title of Bovino's boss and so the Thunder Guardian had known he would never pull the trigger.

The current Bovino boss was a big, burly man. His title was only as the fourth in the line of bosses, because the Bovino family was relatively new in comparison with the ranks of the Vongola.

"Boss, I seek permission to talk to our weapons specialists." Lambo asked, on his knees.

The boss tweaked the cow horns he was wearing, the sign of belonging to the Bovino family, in contemplation. Lambo had carefully chosen to wear his own set to their headquarters.

"I do not understand you, Lambo." The boss sighed wearily. "Was it not your goal in life to achieve my position?"

Lambo stayed very still. He didn't particularly have time to explain, and the boss didn't particularly care to listen.

"Yet at a very young age you ran off and somehow joined Vongola." He continued. "Now you wear your horns and are returning here to ask assistance? I find myself wondering how Bovino could possibly assist the Vongola. Are they in some type of trouble?" He raised an eyebrow and signalled that Lambo could stand.

Ignoring this signal, Lambo frowned deeply.

"Yes... one of the arcobaleno, Reborn, was killed in action."

"I see... but then you should be celebrating, should you not?"

Lambo's face shot up and he glared daggers at the Bovino boss. How could he possibly imagine that Lambo would want to celebrate at the death of the man he loved?

"After all, it was you yourself that stated time and time again that Reborn was your biggest rival?"

"Things change." Lambo hissed through clenched teeth.

The Bovino boss seemed deep in thought.

"I need to talk to our weapons specialists." Lambo repeated.

"Very well," The Boss began as Lambo breathed a sigh of relief. "But in order to do so, you must engage in battle with me. The goal will be to retrieve your Bovino horns, which I will keep in my pocket. I will not set out to kill you, only attempt to keep you from obtaining the horns. Regrettably, if your death is necessary in order to stop you, I will be forced to make it happen. If you wish to attempt to kill me in order to retrieve the horns... then so be it."

Lambo's open eye widened and he groaned. This was unexpected and a waste of time, not to mention that Lambo had never been confident in his fighting ability. Sure, he'd improved, but to perform a lot of his electric based attacks required his horns. He struggled with the idea for a while, before reminding himself that it may save Reborn. Even if he failed and was killed, there was a chance he'd be able to be reunited with Reborn in the afterlife. At this thought, Tsuna's frowning face swam into his mind and faded.

"Yare, yare. Okay, I agree."

As the boss bent over him and plucked the horns off his head, he felt sick with worry... wait, worry? What was he thinking? He knew this sensation.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lambo coughed as the purple smoke cleared around him. This time he found himself standing in the street with an adult I-Pin, Tsuna's mother, Bianchi, Fuuta and Basil. The tenths mother blinked at he and I-Pin in surprise, before frantically looking around the street.

"Where did Lambo and I-Pin run off to _this_ time?" She wondered aloud.

There was an awkward silence while Bianchi dropped her shopping onto the concrete and pulled a large, purple, poison-filled cake out of nowhere.

"ROMEOOOO!" She screamed with a burning venom, before she lunged at Lambo, who ran for his life. He'd never had good experiences with Bianchi- every time they met, she thought he was her ex-boyfriend Romeo. I-Pin leaped off to the side, landing gracefully on her feet and hugging her ramen packages protectively.

Lambo's feet blurred on the pavement, his eyes darting in all directions to search for an escape route. Bianchi's voice roared behind him as he dodged various purple tinted gourmet foods. One hit him directly in the back of the head and he dropped to the ground in pain. The Bovino boss wasn't going to kill him, _this_ crazy bitch was! He nursed his aching head and rolled to observe the object that had struck him down to meet his fate.

'A box?' he thought, picking up the unusually unposionous object. He cautiously flicked it open to see dozens of tiny blue pills. 'Dying will pellets!' he realised with excitement. Bianchi must have accidentally picked up Basil's box to use as ammo against Romeo. He grinned broadly as the purple smoke surrounded him again and Bianchi's furious facial expression dissolved out of reality.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The floor of the Bovino headquarters was decidedly cold and hard, so Lambo decided to pick himself up off of it straight away upon his return. He regretted that he had not been able to re-meet with Reborn and Tsuna in the past on this occasion. He turned to face the Boss again, who, he sweat-dropped to see, was wiping a decidedly large amount of snot from his shoulder.

"You sneezed on me!" he complained.

Lambo apologised and added: "So, are we ready to fight?"


End file.
